YL and my Thursday...

So let's start out with the great news.  Today we had our first campaigners since Christmas break,  (because we had unfortunate scheduling with snow and midterms!) but I have to say the kids came back with so much energy it was great!  They were very excited to be back at Younglife, to see everyone, hang out, share stories, and listen to stories.  2 of them stalked me to get my number and ask for a ride (which, I am not going to complain about at all!) and then we sat there at first talking about break, and which finals were hard and who didn't study at all, and all that.  But then we started talking about things I went to that the kids loved!  I mean, it has just been really hard for me with this group, because they are very much in love with their old YL leader (which is so good for a lot of reasons, but has definitely posed a challenge to me!)  But this was the first night that our interactions were more than just awkward, they really wanted to talk to me.  They wanted to talk to me about running into each other downtown before the inauguration, and tell me stories, and ask about my friends, they wanted to tell me about the basketball games they saw me at, and certain people who are friends with them, and the team, and the boys, and how crazy they got at other games with spirit awards!  I know it sounds very silly and kinda small, but tonight was the first time I felt accepted as their leader.  And I wasn't the only one who noticed it either.  Stefan pulled me aside afterwards and told me he wouldn't be there next week and he wants to do a big RM Kickoff for the next semester, and have me do the talk!  Uh... makin me a bit nervoussssssss.  Part of me wishes he had asked George, but I know he wouldn't have asked me if he didn't feel led or comfortable.  So I mean it is just a small thing, but it really makes me feel much more solidified in the choices I have been making in regards to my future.

After YL I drove some girls home, and then met with Emily.  I love that girl, I mean pretty much every time we get together we talk about one of two things: Jesus or boys.  Tonight was no different.  But she is my only real friend down here that I can talk to about christian things, that isn't involved with YL.  And not that there is any problems at all with people involved with YL, but sometimes I like to talk to people who don't plan their lives around it, or who have a different perspective.  So for me, every time I get to hang out with Emily it is just like hangin out with a sister.  I am super bummed she is moving to the Virginia side of DC this summer!

And I guess the other big news is that mi madre is coming to visit tomorrow!  I am very excited to host her around in Rockville/DC, this is the first time she would have made it here just for a visit.  So I am planning on making sure she has so much fun she needs to come back... with the whole family! ... very often!

Keep it movin... OBAMA!

Ok so, as expected inaugural fever has swept DC.

What was unexpected however, was my own ability to catch said fever.

The last few months of my life have marked a major transition in so many things, and I have to admit that come November, I really did not know who to vote for.  I had been gun-ho for Obama originally, but as I got a quick sucker punch to the face of reality, I realized he may be a bit too radical for my own liking.  Likewise, I really didn't like McCain.  So again, I voted for my president based on who I DIDN'T want to be president.  So needless to say that for me, this inauguration was just blah.  ... until the past week.

Being in DC, I was able to witness firsthand the extreme patriotism that has all but flowed through the city streets.  People have been in good moods down here lately and showing that in their daily lives.  For the first time in a while I can witness the people here on capital hill with a sense of pride and hope that has been lacking for so long.  With such hope, faith, love, and pride, how could I not catch the Obama-flu?

Inauguration day was crazy, and although I was watching the live CNN stream, it was just amazing.  Part of me really wishes I had taken a vacation day.  Some friends staying with us gave us the play by play of their day on capitol hill.  Even in the metro stations which were shut down and at standstills, sprits were high as conductors are SINGING "keep it moving..." while Americans freezing their butts off yelled "OBAMA!"  Apparently that went through a rythm like that as if the whole crowd was singing.

Obama's speech was great.  Forget the Newscasters saying he missed his famous "one liner."  Can we for one minute recognize that this man did not have a speechwriter compose his speech, because he wanted to express the severity of the state of the nation right now and have a heartfelt speech.

Simply put, I hope that Obama was the great leader Bush wasn't.  I want to give Bush his credit and say that he did some good things, but he didn't fill his support staff with people willing to hold him accountable.  The President needs to hear what he needs to hear, not what he wants to hear, and I just pray that Obama will be the accountable leader our country needs right now.  I pray for him and his reign in office, both for the hope that he can do a good job, and the fear that he won't do a great job.  At this point only time will tell, but at least I have my Obama 1.20.09 tee shirt!

Excitement and Adventure!

So sitting on the metro today with Kyle and Danny and Marissa, it came to me... this is the most exciting time of my life!  I feel like I often spend most of my time daydreaming and planning for the future.  Where I will live, what I will do, who I will marry, what I want my family to look like...

But this past week has just been filled with so much joy and excitement it is a bit overwhelming.  Last week I left work early to go meet The Fray with one of my best friends!  It was so beautiful to be there, and honestly, more than being starstruck I was mesmerized by the guitarist.  It was beautiful to sit there in the loft and get to meet other people in DC and listen to the conversation and passion behind a band that I follow and love!

Later I went to Jessica's for a movie and catch up, and do to some bonding with each other.  Of course had an adventurous ride over, turning a 15 minute ride into an hour and a half stressful ride!  I do have to say that when my car was fitzing on the beltway, I was sooooo scared that someone might come up behind me and hit me, but God just blessed me with a lot of peace in my heart.  

Saturday was so wonderful... It was so laid back, I went to the gym and then went to Germantown for the POMs competition, which Richard Montgomery came in First Place!! YEEEAAAAHHH!  I got to see and connect with a lot of my Younglife girls who miss Younglife!  Gosh, I never thought I would be a 23 year old working professional hating midterms! LOL.  But it was sooo great to see them, I am beginning to feel like my relationship with them has finally grown, and it is such a blessing to just witness that!  Afterwards, I had Sarah and Tiger come over and just hang out.  It was so much fun and was just great to have the company

 in such a low key way.

Sunday Jessica left for Scranton, and I met Julia.  Julia posted an ad on craigslist a short time back about a beautiful dog she wanted to go to a great home, and of course I responded.  (I recently made the decision to commit to getting a dog...)  It turns out Julia and I have a lot in common, and she even attends the church I just made my home church!  (Which all in itself was a blessing, it is so much like the church I went to in PA it almost brought tears to my eyes the first week I was there.)  Anyway, Julia is expecting her 4th child under the age of 8 years old, and decided that a dog was not a good idea to focus on.  It was so important to her to find someone who would still be able to keep in touch with the family, and really this worked out in such a God way!  So Sunday was phenomenal because I got to adopt my new yellow lab Daisy!  I am so in love with her already it is ridiculous!

Sunday was not so fun, because of the Eagles game.  I want to say no more on that...

Danny came last night to visit, and he is staying with us for the inauguration.  It was so much fun, again Sarah came over and since we didn't have work today (MLK day) we just stayed up all night watching youtube videos and catching up over glasses of wine.  

Today Kyle and Marissa came back (Marissa is here with us for the inauguration too) and we all went downtown.  DC was so spectacular!  We met with Holly and Sarah and walked through downtown looking at the places and taking pictures.  We metro-ed to Metro Center and walked down Pennsylvania Avenue to the capitol building.  It was so great to enjoy the energy and enthusiasm all around DC, and just to be part of something spectacular!  Unfortunately I have to work tomorrow, but being in DC tonight and being part of the inauguration is just so refreshing to know that I am part of that history!  It is so exciting to be living life, where I am and taking advantage of life, friends, my faith, my role as a younglife leader, and the place that I live.  I have very rarely in my life felt so overwhelmed by the fact that God has just poured beautiful blessings on my life as I am right now.  I am so thankful, and so joyful, and so amazed by what he has revealed in my life, and I am so excited for the rest of it!  

Lies for the good of everyone...

It's funny how God absolutely knew that what I needed in my life here in DC is a small group of girls, who meet together every Tuesday, and share our lives, our food, and our love for Jesus and the gospel. Last night we spoke about lying to each other. Now I don't necessarily consider myself a major liar. I do (I feel) about the average amount of lying, and sometimes I am fully convinced that it is for the good of the cause that I lie.
But God has greatly challenged me in this over the last few days and I am sure into the remainder of the week. Now let me just preface this with the fact that it is known that I may be the worlds worst liar. So you would think that would keep me from telling lies, because I am just SO BAD at it, I am almost always caught. Or I let the lie catch up to me...
I have had a lot of meaningless friendships and relationships throughout my life, and since realizing that there is more in this world than myself, I have done the pendulum swing, sometimes placing more expectation or meaning in a friendship or a relationship than is there. I feel sometimes like I am overcompensating for the horrible and selfish ways I treated people growing up. So when faced with the fact that one of these overcompensated really important friendships are threatened, it scares me. So all I can do is lie to try and protect it.
I guess I never really thought about lying in the way that we feel is protecting others. When faced with telling the truth and hurting someone or lying to them and hurting them less, it is always what hurts them less, right? I guess I have just realized that these hurt everyone in the long run. I look at how this friendship has been disrepected, torn down, and completely degraded, just because I felt it would be better to lie to someone and pretend it was ok. Last night I realized that we are integrated in our friends lives because God doesn't want us to be hiding from them, just like he doesn't want us to hide from him.
When is it appropriate to tell the truth? The easy answer is always, although I feel that answer is a bit niave and idealist. We spoke yesterday about not saying anything, and I feel this is the way God is challenging me the most. With this particular example of a relationship, had I not said anything we wouldn't have suffered the way we did. Likewise (and here I am goign to play the blame game) if I had been offered the truth at the time, things would be much different. I guess this whole thing is just really hard for me to swallow, and after last night I am much more equipped to just nod in faith and say, yes, I am done trying to fix this lie. Because the truth has already presented itself, the lie is blown, and I know the only thing that can fix it, is not me.
Such is life... tossing out the pressure to fix things, and the idea that lies can make things easier...

Christmas in the Potts Family

So Christmas was a crazy and hectic time.  I love my family and so it was very good to be back in Pennsylvania with them.  It also made me realize how much I love my best friends like family.  I spent Christmas morning with my family in front of our Christmas tree, and just sang and talked and then we went to church as a family.  That was so heartwarming.  I remember when church was kinda an afterthought.  Now I see the merging of my favorite thing in the world with my favorite people in the world, and it makes me smile to see the convergence of the two.

I really enjoyed watching Jeff Dunham with my family and laughing about the jokes, and making "christmas e-cards" for family and friends.  Beth and I came up with cute video dances for "I want a hippopotamus for christmas" "christmas in kilarney" and "melikilee mwaha" It was fun to just be crazy silly and send that love to some great kids. 

I also realized that I have a crazy family.  No really my family is crazy.  Sitting at my family dinner is like a warped soap opera.  And you know what?  I love them all.  They are my family, and although being with all of them sometimes is a bit exhausting, I know that not only do I love them, but also I would do anything for them.  No real in-depth updates, just an overall generalization that I love my family and I love my life.  And I love who I have become, and I love the people God has put in my life.

<3

Part of a great adventure...

Ok so happy Sunday before Christmas!!  There has been so much going on right now it is ridiculous!  I also just want to say that Christmas is just around the corner.  Is anyone else surprised by this?

Let's start with Tuesday.  Tuesday at small group we met, ate dinner, and hung out with each other.  It was the last time we would all be in community like that for a while.  We did Secret Santa, took a few great pictures, and just enjoyed each other.  It was beautiful and wonderful.  It will be one of my more  fondly remembered evenings for a while.  

Friday was my work holiday party.  At this point I had already worked for about 60 hours for the week, so honestly being around more work people was just not what I was looking forward to.  I had to sit at the table and check in employees and hand out drink tickets.  I finally got to sit down for some dinner, and it was so awkward.  I have a few friends at work.  Only one that I really like and would hang out with outside of work.  Of course she was super late because traffic is bad in DC, especially on a Friday... in the rain.  So I sat awkwardly with some people who had no one at their table, and I felt bad.  The older man David was chugging his wine, and then as the evening progressed, continued to hit on me, only adding to the awkwardness.  Meanwhile, my wine glass was empty.  The waiters kept coming around and still no wine in my glass.  So I finally flagged down my waiter, and say, excuse me, can I get a glass of wine?  He says only if you show me your ID.  ---- At the CORPORATE HOLIDAY PARTY AT THE RITZ CARLTON - they carded me... that was so embarrassing!  I ended up sitting with the security folks and Lili decided she wants to set me up with her son.  I am thinking eh... where is the harm.  But THEN Doug and John decided they also want me to date their sons...  ohhhhhhhhhh goodness.  But I have found it.  The best way to find men.  Befriend their parents at work!

Anyway after dinner I had about enough of the holiday party.  After my 1 and 1/2 glasses of wine, as I am saying goodbye, my boss pulls me aside and expresses sincere concern for my intoxication levels and going home.  I told him I had little more than one glass, and I have an entire metro ride home before I got to my car.  He was very insistent that I had been drinking heavily and needed to be escorted home.   How do you handle that?  I wanted to tell him, NOT DRUNK, NOT EVEN CLOSE!  I was able to convince him that I was fine to walk to the metro with someone and would be absolutely fine to metro and drive.

So I was so thankful to head out of the holiday party, and headed to Stefan's house for the YL party.  I got there just in time for dirty santa (white elephant).  It was just so much fun, I love my YL friends.  We hung out all night upstairs, Stefan, Buffy, Kristina, Lita, Nick, Emma, Amanda and I.  We got to hang out, joke, and talk about how YL and WL is going to look with Amanda gone.

Saturday Kyle and I went to Amanda's to pick up a new sofa.  We of course got distracted and ended up looking at the luxury condos near Grovesner Metro in the $1million range.  Hahaha, yea we are dreaming, but they were beautiful.  It made me excited for whenever I have a man to go shopping for a condo or house with!  It is exciting to consider starting a family and having a home.  Then we got the sofa, which led me to rearrange my room to incorporate my loveseat.  Then I went shopping and to California Tortillas for lunch, and it was sooooo yummy!  Then I got ready to head downtown with Sarah and Holly for our girls night.  It was so much fun!  Food, wine, new friends, and catch phrase?  Such a great time.  

Today was the best though.  Chris came down for the Eagles game, and we went to the Redskins stadium.  I had the best time.  It was so cold, we were as high up as you could possibly sit, and it took us forever to get there.  But you know what?  It was soooo great.  I just wish they had won.  The Eagles just could not deliver today and it was sad.  I didn't get to say goodbye to Amanda.  That was sucky but I know she needed to get ready to go.  It is just weird to think that Tuesday I won't be hanging out at her house for dinner.  We are planning on getting together tomorrow and so I am going to try so hard to get there.  This is going to be a crazy week at work, and I am not looking forward to these deadlines and deliverables being forced on me.  But Merry Christmas on Thursday!

Let me tell you a story about old man Joe

Old man Joe.  I really liked that man.  You know those people that are just very intriguing? Joe was like that.  He didn't say much until he got to like you. I remember my first day at the law firm I saw Joe.  I couldn't figure out how to work my time card.  He said hi to me and I said hi back.  He asked if I worked there now, I told him I am the new HR assistant.  He looks at me and goes, well sweetheart, a pretty girl like yourself can't work the timecard?  Better learn, fore you drive them boys crazy.  And that was Joe.  I was the new HR Assistant, and Joe said probably the least likely thing a new HR Assistant would hear.  My first impression of Joe: a hardened smart alec man, wreaking of cigarettes and with crooked teeth... yet very intriguing.

Over the next few weeks I got to know Joe better and better.  He took to me pretty easily, and he didn't do that to most people there.  Joe and I had a great relationship, he asked me a lot about college and God, and dating and friendships and dreams, and listened very much.  Joe told me the stories of his wife.  He would get me really going with these stories about his wife.  One day the two of us are sitting in the lunchroom, and I asked him about what he and his wife were planning to do for the weekend.  That is when I found out that Joe's wife was dead.  She had died two years back from lung cancer.  Then Joe just went on and on, talking about how the sweet girl (he always called her his "sweet girl") never so much as puffed on a cigarette, and he smoked for 35 years, and she died.  It was really sad, but what really got me was when he explained to me that with every puff of a cigarette he took he felt close to her again, yet somehow felt he was killing her all over again.  What a sad life!  Joe has lived as a constant slave to his own guilt.  He is a slave to his addiction as well as his guilt and loneliness missing his "sweet girl."  

That story makes me really sad for Joe every time I think about it.  I really like that man, but also think about what a terrible life it would be to constantly live in guilt and loneliness.  But how often is that us?  How often do we choose not to live in the freedom of life, love, and faith and cut our guilt and loneliness and seek the things that are wonderful?  My prayer is that I find the strength to cut my chains, and that we all do.  How much better will it be when we can trade our regrets for dreams and faith... in everything we do? 

The reason I liked Joe so much was because he was genuine.  He really wanted to be my friend, and have a friend of his own, but I know that I could never really be friends with Joe, because he was always trapped.  Let's not let that become ourselves...

Is it really only Tuesday...?

Ok so I am ready to put my head through my desk today! New York was so great, but very much so contributed to my lack of sleep that I was already suffering with. Yesterday I of course had to stay up and watch the Eagles kick the pants off of the Browns (honestly I was so tired, I THINK that is who we played, I can't even tell you for sure!) What a terrible week to detox my body from caffeine! I feel like my head is 100 pounds and it is so painful! This is going to be a long week anyway, we will see if I make it. But I think it is really important that I suffer through this for a few reasons, so although Tuesday is looking bleak, I am hoping the rest of the week will get easier and easier.
Tonight is the Christmas party/ Goodbye Amanda party. Wow, it is going to be so weird with her not being here anymore. I hope she and her family have a great life down in North Carolina and that God just blesses them in so many ways. But she was the first "real friend" I made down here, and it is going to be hard to say goodbye to her so soon after meeting her! My Tuesday night small group has for all practical purposes been one of the highlights of my week, week after week. I love the girls I am with, and I just hope this changes the dynamic of our group in a positive and challenging way.
Work is going to kick my butt this week, I have soooo much pressure to get these documents collected from everyone and in such an extreme timeline. I hope work honors the Dec. 26 new Federal Holiday that G. Bush just declared. Because really... that would be so great! It is so hard to believe that Christmas is only one week away! ahhhh!! Yes! Anyway, back to work, our holiday party is this Friday at the Ritz downtown, and I had to do the ultimate embarassing thing, and RSVP for me and a date, and then go back and say, just kidding. No date. Literally Beth looked at me like, ohhhh I am sorry you have no date anymore. Ack! But it is for the best anway, I have to run the welcome table and greet everyone. I feel like it might be awkward, from what Kyle told me about his holiday party I hope not to see any of that. I do not want anyone to be going to the hospital like his, or have scandoulous stories going around the office on Monday. So, here is for a lot of work this week, and having a great holiday party where everyone behaves themselves! *Cheers!*

Weekend in NY

So you might have expected it, but New York was amazing!! Friday night rolled in around 9 and headed through Penn Station to the Long Island Rail to head out to Rockville Center.  It was really great to see Jackie again!  It's so weird from living with your best friends all the time to rarely seeing them.  Of course we didn't go out, but because I ate a salad at 1:15 that afternoon and nothing else until I arrived in Long Island at 11ish, we needed to hit up a diner.  It was super cool to catch up, talk about work, boys, memories.  Jackie mentioned an internship she was applying for.  With this great farm owner, they head up their own diverse farmer's market.  Where else?  PHOENIXVILLE, PA!! Unbelievable.  It always amuses me when best friends always end up integrated in your life in random ways.  It highlights God's greater plan for things working out they way we can never imagine.

She decorates her ceiling by the way.  Hands down the coolest thing I have ever seen.  I meant to get a picture, but flat out forgot, so if I can grab one from her I will make sure to get that up.  Catherine, Jack and I went to Macy's to get some holiday shopping, and I decided I like women from Long Island.  At least the ones that shop at Macy's.  They always talk to you!  They are brash, but sweet at the same time.  Really one of a kind.  I love them though.  I also realized that I need to shop with Jackie and Catherine more, because I spent little money and got some cool stuff!  We ended up going to Barnes and Noble and then I headed out to Brooklyn.  

I love the city.  This weekend made me begin to regret buying BDawk a few weeks ago, because it might be nice to live downtown in the city.  But either way, I have a car, a place next to work, and things seem to be going ok for now.  Maybe later in my life I will move closer to the city.  (Or to NC like I always joke about!)

When I got to Brooklyn I walked to Bergen St.  Goooooosh, I love being in Brooklyn with them.  For whatever reason I feel completely at home in Brooklyn.  We decorated the house complete with plastic light up christmas trees, tinsel, and an entire brooklyn zoo on their front yard!  We had a penguin, two red birds, a snowman, and a moose with a moving head!  All highlighted by bright christmas lights!  It was quite the fun experience, and Maya got to demonstrate her great talent of decorating by making sure everything was just the way she wanted.  It turned out great though!  I missed Alex and Daniel's soccer game, but apparently they lost so it wasn't a total loss.  It was just so great to hang out with the kids so much, they are all doing great!  Daniel and I practiced his monologue from To Kill a Mockingbird.  It was so much fun, and brought me way back.  And of course, the two of us basically ended up being the drunk character pretending to fall all over each other swearing about Jem and Scout.  Hahaha, it is the little things that make me smile real big!

We watched the Grinch, had a big "family dinner" and just settled in for the night.  This morning we went to the Catholic church downtown, and I loved it!  The priest was fun and funny, and was just great.  Because I never made it to NYC for Janice and JF's wedding, I got to see the church they got married in.  It was just so nice to be there with them.  The priest began to talk about one of his favorite people in the church.  Thomas Merton.  I was BLOWN AWAY.  I am reading one of his books right now.  I love it so much, I can not move deep into the book, I keep starting off all over again because it is so full of wonderful insights and deep attributes to faith.  I really want to either find a devotional to take you piece by piece through that book, or create one.  It wouldn't be hard because it is based completely on his meditation of the Scripture, but very time consuming.  Anyway, then we went to a cute little craft shop afterwards.

We hung out around the house for a bit.  Alex had another soccer game, but I missed it because I was at church with Maya, Daniel, and Janice.  He lost and then came back in a stinky mood, but nevertheless it was sooooo great to see that kid again!  Daniel and I played basketball, and Maya and I watched some Gilmore Girls.  

Then it happened.  We went to the movies.  We saw Twilight.  I SAW TWILIGHT.  OMG.  I have been fighting this cult-like phenomenon since YL Summer Camp.  The worst part?  I actually liked the movie.  It was cute.  Still don't understand the obsession, but yes.  It was cute.  

Anyway all in all I really enjoyed the weekend, and it was so nice to get away.  Unfortunately, old heartaches and friendships came with me, and that was heard to deal with.  But traveling always helps clear my mind, whether it is by bus, train, or plane, and seeing the people I did just made everything perfect.  Now it is time to hold on to my wallet.  Hopefully Christmas comes and goes, and I have been praying about this control thing, and it is seeming to me like something God is leading me to.  I am going to keep praying on it, but I think that January will be a challenging month for me, and I am very excited about it.

My finest (and hardest) December yet!

December is Christmas!!   Today I am getting ready to go to NYC to visit the kids and to see some friends from college.  I have never been to New York at Christmastime, so I am very excited to go and explore.  I also bought a car 2 weeks ago.  That is right my friends! Dudley the white creeper van is finally gone!  So this new car is beautiful.  I love it.  I named it BDawk (Brian Dawkins)  That brings me to my next big news.  My sister is coming down here for the Eagles Redskins game, and we will be going together! I am so happy about this.  I don't care where I sit or anything, I am just so happy to go and watch the Eagles play live that nothing can stop me!  Also going on is Christmas parties, Younglife, Wyldlife (Brand new!) and the upcoming program launch at work!  Last Tuesday we had a wedding shower for my friend Jess, and it was so nice and fun.  I really love my Tuesday night small group.  I am very much going to miss Amanda when she leaves, and am just relying on God that he mold our small group in a way that glorifies him.  It will be interesting to see how it changes with different leadership.  One thing is for certain that I have really come to love those girls, and in a lot of ways they are what makes me feel like this is home.  I love DC, and I love my job, but it was very hard for me to settle here.  Maybe it was because I had a lot of changes and a lot going on, but now things are finally settling for me.  I just hope I can afford to live through January!  Eagles games, NYC, a new car... ahhhhh I need to stop spending.  I wonder if I should set myself up on a self control plan.  Almost like fasting, but financially.  That is a great idea to pray on, I will keep you posted.  Updates about NYC to follow!