Stay the Track!

I have no control.  Really.  My life in the last week has been one exercise after another of the Lord just showing me that I have no control.  Certain boys - I have no control over.  Certain relationships and they way I want them to look/grow/develop - I have no control over.  I have no control over my car, or my health (to an extent), or my job.  I just have to do the best I can with each one of them and put my trust and faith in the fact that it will work out.  Nothing is a sure bet, and this is what I'm learning.

We all have dark times in our lives.  I am inclined to believe that I see more of these dark times than other people in my life, but I know that isn't true.  We all have our own issues, and just have to work hard at getting through them.  It is important to remember that 'Life is good, but I do believe it's getting better.'  But it's also important not to discount the struggles that we (inevitably) will face each day, each month, each year. 

I have been a roll with the punches kinda girl.  I always will be.  You can sucker punch me in the face, and I will ice my cheeks and move on.  You can hit me with a car, but I will still run a 10 miler.   Resiliency is something that I sometimes wonder if I have mastered, and other times wonder if I even understand.  Ironically enough, I can fully admit that my spiritual gift may be encouragement - but only because I have heard that from many people.  I still struggle to really see how encouraging I can be, and oddly enough, I search deeply for encouragement from others in my life, and can (selfishly) be discouraged when I don't receive it. 

But regardless, I am a get up and move on kinda girl.  Call it the Philly in me, call it being my father's daughter, or just call it having a tough shell, but I am so glad that I have no control over this life, and can not determine all the outcomes.  When it really comes down to it, the surprises (however challenging) are what inspire me to grow.  And although I sometimes forget that, I realize that we will never survive a challenge without the frame of mind to acknowledge that we can come out a better person than when we went in.  Contrary to my (occasionally) rough persona, I definitely can see the image of the pearl, totally being refined and scrubbed (however harshly) to see myself coming out beautiful and flawless. 

But please do remember me in your prayers at this time (or well-wishes if you aren't the praying type).  Between my job, some important relationships, and finances, things have been looking dismal.  But I can see that this life is only as good as we make it, because we are made for something so much more.  So bring on the challenges, because I got my Jesus-helmet on, and I am taking them head-on. 


And have I mentioned?

Life is so good.  And I do believe, it's getting better.