Chronicles of a Fake Grown-Up: August 2010

Sunday, August 22, 2010

I am yours... beautiful and loved

Lord. here I am.

I am small and broken, and I am humbled by your grace.

Lord, I fall into your open arms, knowing you are there to catch me.

When I get so caught up in what I want, I chase after it, even when I know I am running downhill. When I get too much momentum, I tumble down the hill, and there you are... a loving Father who will wrap me up in his arms, and convince me that whatever scrapes I have are temporary, and it is all ok. Right there... in your arms.

Lord, take my heart, fill it with your love, and help me remember that you are the one I want to be with. It is you that I want to love and care for me, and it is you that can love me more perfectly than any human can. Thank you for loving me the way you do, and reminding me to try to love myself the way you love me. Rejection and doubt will fade away, but only as I let you push them away. Father God, protect me, and encourage me to seek after you. Your plan and your time is more perfect than I could ever want, and I want to delight in you, and you alone.

I trust you with my heart and with my life.

Thank you for calling me your own.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

New Tattoo!

Ok, so for those of you who don't know, I have a tattoo on my hip. Jules and I went to get it right after I turned 18 and got back from Younglife camp when I was younger, so it was more of an inpulsive move than anything else.
This one I have been thinking about and praying about for quite a while. I love it. I love the image, the location, the symbolism, and I can't wait to get it done. I will be headed to Bethesda Tattoo this Friday for my consultation, and next week I have a date with Lea to get it done! Her work looks amazing and when I went in I knew I wanted either her or James, and since James isn't accepting new customers, it was an easy choice. Lea seems to be pretty comfortable with rib tattoos, and I have seen some of the ones she's done so far, and they look great, so I am on board.

So I am getting a phoenix. Check out my two inspirations here:

I want to do something more like the gray-scale image with the color and vibrance of the yellow-orange-red one. And the reason I chose a Phoenix is for a few reasons. First of all, I am from Phoenixville, and this tattoo is to pay some tribute to where I came from. We can all acknowledge in life that we may not be defined by where we came from, but we do hold on to that througout our lives. The Phoenix is a bird that burns itself into ashes, and then arises up out of the ashes to a new reborn life. I love that imagery of recreating yourself into a new creature of power and majesty. Also, I have been thinking lately about incorporating some people in my life into the tattoo. I want to somehow dedicate part of this tattoo to the memory of Karin and Catherine, because I have often wondered why or how God works, and allows certain people to live and others to die before they even had a chance. I was thinking about maybe getting a C and a K on the heart of the Phoenix, but I haven't thought that through completely yet, and would appreciate any advice from creative minds.

Anyway, just wanted to share that because I am very excited, and want to encourage you to watch out for facebook next week to see a picture upload of the tattoo.